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[Dear All, Please be aware that we do encourage people to post their comments to the list rather than just to individuals. Debate and exchange of knowledge is what keeps the list alive and interesting. Best wishes, Hera List Editor] From: Paula Hall [mailto:paula_hall@btinternet.com] Sent: 30 October 2012 16:21 I commented to some of the earlier posts directly but would like to reiterate some of what I said on this listserv too. I specialise in sex addiction, although the term is far from adequate or accurate, and one of the most frustrating assumptions and misconceptions is that sex addiction is in anyway associated with a high sex drive. That would be like saying alcoholics are thirstier than other people. It is the function of the behaviour and relationship to it that defines it as compulsive, out of control, or just 'a problem' or whatever the client wants to call it. The label is challenging but in my experience 'sex addiction' is a grass roots term that is used by the people who self-define as sufferers. Many do not think they have a high sex drive. Most get little or no sexual gratification from what they do. Alcoholics drink alcohol because of how it makes them feel emotionally and what it helps them escape emotionally. And most don't care if it's whiskey or gin or special brew as long as it gets the required result. Similarly the type of sexual behaviour engaged in is often irrelevant and infinitely varied - what bothers most sex addicts is not what they do, but they lengths they'll go to, to do it in spite of the negative consequences to their lives. In terms of numbers - due to popular demand, the first all female sex addiction self-support group has just started in London. And in a survey I did recently that will be published by Routledge in Understanding & Treating Sex Addiction next month, 25% of the respondents were female. Please let me stress the word 'survey' not 'research' - I am not an academic, just a lowly therapist responding to client demand - most of which call themselves 'sex addicts'. I had an article published in the peer reviewed journal, Sexual & Relationship Therapy last year where I propose a non-pathologising biopsychosocial view and also moan about the labels 'addiction' and especially - 'hypersexuality'. I tried to attach it but it bounced back but hopefully those that are interested can google it or do email me direct. Paula Hall Sexual & Relationship Psychotherapist Sex Addiction Therapist, UK UKCP Reg, BACP Acc, COSRT Acc, ATSAC Website: www.paulahall.co.uk
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